Creativity Pep Talk

When you stand of the precipice of really going for something it is amazing how many doubts and fears pop up. I am in the final stages of editing and I have someone working on a cover so that I can self publish my first novel. My excitement most days is tempered by this absurd fear of failure. I haven’t even tried and I am worried that it will be mocked, ridiculed and any other negative thought you might be capable of imagining. Yet that isn’t what keeps me up at night. Late at night when my creative muse prefers to do her little dance I have to reconcile myself to the idea that even if it is terrible I won’t stop. I can’t stop writing, I find myself doing it all the time I can’t imagine a day without it. 

I have found solace in that I am not alone- writers while it’s a solitary activity are never alone.

Below is a great TED talk from Elizabeth Gilbert that I encourage all writers or people with a creative instinct watch.

Your Elusive Creative Genius

Window Thoughts

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Staring out my window I dream.

Staring out my window I procrastinate.

Staring out my window I can see my future.

Staring out my window I contemplate self-doubt.

One day I won’t have to look out this window ever again.

As To Be

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Six word stories with this photograph in Denver as the setting:

Wall discourse sets us all free.

I was not once seen plainly.

To be everything is a trap.

His proposal under the bridge failed.

Only the shadows warm my heart.

Happiness given by uniquely blue letters.

In the window my reflection soared.

Against the wall she loved him.

The sun dried tears of bliss.

Unseen she was still his world.

 

Fortune

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The fortune teller in the window is calling my name. I went once before but the accuracy was so great that I have never returned. No one ever told me what a burden it would be to know your fate. It makes you question every move you make. You don’t know what is worse; to live out your prophecy or to corrupt your future as it was ordained. I want both and I want neither which is why I only look when I pass the fortune teller calling my name.

Stumbling Into A Passion

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This post might seem silly or even tedious. This blog is after all dedicated for the most part to my writing. However, I now think that I may have been wrong in my labeling it as my passion.

True my goal is to be a published author.

It’s also true that I have a deep love for writing and it gives me immense pleasure to write.

Yet neither of those things could honestly be labeled as what I am most passionate about.

Perhaps it is counter intuitive but those two things I have found are actually the result of one true passion.

There was a moment, an epiphany, when I found that my greatest desire is to tell stories.

There is nothing more that I want than to tell stories. There might not even be anything I wouldn’t risk for it.

How does this change everything?

Does it change anything?

I don’t have the answer to that just yet but I look forward to finding one.

For an unknown reason I feel like that answer if I find it might just be profound.