Coldness

Any other time of year-

I look outside for an escape, to escape.

Not today, the cold it seems has expanded from inside me to out. 

Desolate, sad, and the anti-hope.

There is no relief.

I seek release.

Instead, I’ll run my pen over the paper yet another time.

Reaching 


Dance with the clouds.

Walking this path more often than not gasping for breath, it feels possible. 

If I just make it that final mile, those last few steps for ascension, impossible seems inevitable.

The sun has moved, it’s no longer rising.

My legs have tremors pulsing from thigh to toe.

What if this is it?

I am only meant to witness, not participate.

Would it bring fulfillment enough?

Division

DSCN1400Even in the most open of spaces there are now lines drawn –

Some lines strong than ever, other merely a trite formality –

What purpose do they serve?

Is it to keep something or someone out?

I think, much to my disappointment, it is to keep –

Someone inside.

Shady

In the seemingly cold air of the shade I can find warmth.
The sun may try to sneak in but it can be avoided.

There is comfort there- provided by the trunk, the branches and the leaves.

The hard ground is a companion.

I am able to prepare while lurking.

I am not waiting to launch an attack but rather waiting for myself.

Waiting to be ready to step into the sun for I know this time there will be no retreat.

If I leave again I can never go back into the shade.

Once in the sun all flaws will be revealed and I must no I have to accept them.

Never again shady.